clumsy

why am i so clumsy?? in the HR department for the 3rd week now and i think there is not a single day where i dont make a mistake.. seriously.. i dont know whats wrong with myself.. i really have to think over an instruction given to me, whether its just a simple one... i feel so blur and dumb... i think my supervisor will think im a dumb blond with black hair... sighhhh... i dont know what to do.. God help me.. im kinda depressed frequently... i need u God.. i need u... .... ..... ... ..

warm!

its so warm here in pd! the sun is being very generous with its energy!! i havent taken my lunch today and i've just been eating biscuits and bread since morning! this is the result of living away from ur family and the convenience of living in Kepong where there are so many places to buy food.. but even if i were in kepong, i wouldnt know what i want to eat when mom asks me... lalalalala...

wow.. 3 posts today! what an achievement after a VERY long time of not blogging! =)

running out of time

referring to my previous post's title, im actually supposed to write about this and not what happened last night..haha.. anyways.. i realise that my emotions can change really fast..

i realise that im running out of time.. but u dont seem to bother...i dont want to say it out coz i'll just look stupid in the end... this is the constant result that i get in this situation.. when will this ever end???.. im so tired and frustrated... how come it seems so easy for others??

i read my fren's blog and i get encouraged.. she doesnt seem to let her problems weigh her down while i carry my burden on my shoulders 24hours a day till the weight of it casts a frown on my face.. i've to be more positive... i've tried to... guess there's no choice but to continue to be positive?

i dont know...

yesterday was a real day of testing for me... i wasnt feeling well and we had to help out in this chinese banquet dinner by UOB bank.. since im in HR and yesterday was a Saturday, my frens and i had to work from 9am-1pm, then come back for the banquet at 3-11pm.. i just had to fall sick that morning and i knew that throughout the entire day, i needed God to hold my hand, give me strength and wisdom, put my faith in him and carry on with the show.. i indeed want to thank Him coz without His help, i would have been totally miserable..

wasnt feeling comfortable when my frens and i were walking back to the hotel for our afternoon shift.. felt like vomiting the entire time but it just couldnt come out. although i had no appetite to eat, i needed to eat so that i could vomit and sure enough after eating, i vomited... after that, i felt much better but weak.. how am i gonna serve the guests later?? with the heavy huge plates, bowls, walking down the stairs to the level below to collect each meal course.. the thought of it actually scared me... i really had no strength to do all that.. i didnt want to tell my frens that i felt weak coz i dont think they would believe me and perhaps thought im exegerating? only God and myself knew how i felt last night..

changing into our yellow uniforms and looking like Digi promoters, we went into the ballroom to set up the table settings and stuff.. the UOB group had a meeting in the ballroom before that and we had to do a turnover which results in rushing, managers and organizers anger flaring, shouting, running around and all the last minute stuff.. i was in charge of table no.8 which is near to the front.. my heart throbbed.. God help me!!

after setting up the tables, wiping cutlerys, standing at our designated table and hearing the manager saying that the doors can be opened, the guests all poured into the ballroom..my table were all uncles and 1 aunty.. 2 uncles who loved to drink and kept asking me to get ice for them, resulting in me constantly going to the bar counter to get ice and Seena asked me, 'ur guest is eating ice or what?'...LOL..

when i went to pick up the food for the first time, i went down the wrong stairs.. note: hotel staff cant use the hotels main walkway so we have to use the stairs, which there are 3 different stairs.. so, i opened the door and got confused for awhile.. at the end of the corridor, i saw the Head Chef and he smiled at me and pointed me the right way.. i laughed.. and blushed at my clumsy silly self? lol..

the dinner was really loud and the people were all over the place.. they just wouldnt sit at their own table and kept yam-seng-ing... there were constant performances and people were all crowding around to watch which made our serving and walking difficult.. the night ended with the banquet manager calling us to a seperate meeting room, scolded the part-timers for their lousy job done and allowed us to go back home.. it was 11.30pm+.. my frens and i were hungry so we went to PD town at a small and lonely mamak stall and ate maggie goreng.. reached back home at 1.30am+, bathe and crawled into bed..

if i were to describe how was every course of the meal, it would be a very very long post..just note one thing..those huge plates dont only look heavy, they really are heavy.. and serving a table where the people are talking to each other and not welcoming this waitress who cuts their conversation just to serve them and do her job is not easy.. Thank God for his help because halfway thru, i just wanted to go to the locker room , crouch on the floor and wish i wasnt sick and wont get this type of sickness everytime..