today was a stressful day indeed... but one thing i must say is that im proud of myself.. coz i think i handle situations better now.. although i was still stressed, i felt more at ease this time when trouble came. all glory be to God! thanks for helping me.. =)
i left office at 7.20 today, which is very late and it was still jam outside! i still havent finished my work but enough is enough.. i cant take it already.. while driving home, i already told myself im gonna pass one task to my Director.. wait a minute, that task is supposed to be done by directors and managers themselves! us coordinators are actually doing alot of their work... if our boss finds out about this, they are so screwed.. also, we're having problem with the 'buddy' system RBE implemented. i think CL got to taste, first hand, of how that 'buddy' does her job.. i really dont know how to work with that 'buddy' in the future.. on my way home, i can only commit this whole situation and the 'buddy' to God.. coz its really out of my control to improve the situation..
after a tiring day, i heard something that is so unfair, shocking and sad from my mom.. i didnt really react when i first heard it.. but after i digested it and allowed it to sink in, i swallowed my tears as i ate alone, with my back facing my mom so that she wont see.. my heart sank.. Lord... why? thats all i can ask and say... please protect S... dont let S take away his/her own life away... i really cant do anything but pray.. and have faith?
no wonder i suddenly felt sad/no mood yesterday.. i was wondering why coz i felt just fine in the morning... apparently, mom told me that this thing happened yesterday.. so my spirit was disturbed? i even suddenly prayed for S in the morning on my drive to work.. this is not the first time where i felt sad/no mood suddenly..
im tired.. i thought last week's break was a good one (though i didnt get much rest at all) but it turns out, it isnt enough! time to head to bed soon.. i just felt like i wanna hug u.. wanna tell u my worries and feel ur comfort.. but that obviously wont happen coz ur so oblivious.. haha.. wishful thinking.. :P
of trying times indeed.. so this is the part where we pray, trust God & cast all our worries aside? hard to do, but all things are possible thru Christ who strengthens me.. Amen. (:
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